Thursday, March 13, 2008

Are You *BLEEP*ing Kidding Me?

Ok, so I was filling up my car with gas the other night, and the mood caught me right that I needed a nice cold beverage. It was about 9:30 and I went in and got myself a nice 32 oz. Dr. Pepper/Coca~Cola mix, or as I call it 'Black Gold.' Anywho, there is a middle-aged woman ahead of me buying a small drink and a pack of gum. The cashier beep-beeped it and the total was $1.83. Meanwhile, here I am sip-sipping my delicious beverage...you don't want to have your drink to be half gone by the time you leave! Am I right? So this lady proceeds to pull out her check book.................................................................................. Umm.......................really? Are you serious? I knew she wasn't buying gas, or anything else for that matter, just a small drink and a pack of Juicy Fruit.

So she begins to fill out the check, and I swear she must have been writing in hieroglyphics, because no normal person takes 3 minutes to write a damn check! I just sat there like a deer in the headlights...straw in mouth, but nothing going. Was I really seeing this? Surely this can't be happening. A check for $1.83. I just wanted to shoot myself. So I thought I would make the best of the situation and walked back to the soda fountain and topped off my drink with a little Pepsi. Now that I was rocking the "Holy Trinity," all would be ok. Nope, crazy lady began to balance her checkbook at the register. Was I invisible? I just inched my way to the register, uttered those magical words, "New cup,"..."$1.06."...kaching! I'm out. The lady was still balancing her checkbook when I left.

Ok, I understand the need for a checkbook, and at times, it is the best way to pay for things. But to buy a small drink and a 5-piece Juicy Fruit? Are you *BLEEP*ing Kidding Me?

It's called a Debit Card...

"Check" into it!

6 comments:

JoshB. said...

Classic! You should have just punched here back to 1983! How was that for a witty remark? I honestly don't think I can remember how to write a check. Something with money, over zero and my name right? Screw it. You know what would have made this story even better? If it was like a 30 year old guy doing it. Still freakin' awesome.

Whitney said...

hahaha, that is hilarious! and no, you don't want to be almost be done with my drink either! i totally hear ya

brohammas said...

That was a nice little visa check card commercial with an angry edge. Nice. You have inspired me to carry a sack of pennies with me into every conveniance store I enter..no, not to hit people with but to see how long it takes over-caffinated mustached men to explode.

Free Ice Cream said...

My own little story on the flip side. I am standing at the register with $100 worth of groceries and three little boys trying to make a break for it. A senior citizen in front of me keeps getting denied with the plastic no less then half a dozen times (thats 6 different cards). I guess she needed to balance the check book a little longer.

Starrlight said...

It has been so long since I have written a check I am not sure I remember how!

And I would have told her "hey lady, do you thing you are the center of the world? How bout you balance that at home and get the hell out of my way?"

Of course I have a bad attitude :P

Miss Lindsey said...

Haha Scott this was the funniest thing ever.. thanks for sharing!! That would bug me too! :)